I am sick.
This is true.
It must be acknowledged.
It must be said.
Only then can it be dealt with.
She tried to say it, but the words couldn’t quite leave her tongue. She’s trying. I’ve been there before. I won’t push her, I can wait. The fact that she’s trying to find the words to say what she feels means that she feels, something. Something beautiful, because it’s easier to speak words of hate than to express love and beauty. And I feel it too. It’s in her eyes. I can wait because language isn’t something that comes naturally to all people, but feelings are. Whether they are of hate, or love. It’s difficult to find the words to express the love that’s in your heart because love is overwhelming and you have to remember to keep breathing steadily because she’s the most delicate creature you’ve ever touched and you want to never cause her suffering and you feel like crying but you can’t because you have to be strong, you should be looking after her so she cannot be the one wiping away your tears as well as her own, so you can not, must not, DON’T YOU DARE CRY IN FRONT OF HER. All of this is racing through your mind and all you can say is “I think I-” and you turn away from her. This moment has to be perfect. She’s waited so long. She deserves perfection and joy and love and you want to give her everything because she has given you all there is of her and you’re watching her slowly disappear because she has nothing left. You want to give her your equivalent of her beauty, her ability to love. This is what she has given you and this is what she deserves.
I understand, it was difficult for me too, but you knew what I felt before I said it and you waited. I prefer to feel than to hear it because “I love you” is too short, to simple to describe everything I feel about you. We are not simple. Three words, and eight letters is simply not enough to comprehend what is going through my mind. I don’t need to hear those three syllables. Not until they’ve burst through your anxieties and made their way out of your tongue. It doesn’t have to be tonight.
i came third at my first slam last week btw
I’m in love with you and it feels like I’m constantly bashing my head against a metal wall. It hurts, it’s awful and I’m aware that I should stop but I carry on; because I’m in love with you.
(So I love words, but punctuation etc I don’t get so I don’t actually know when you’re supposed to use a semi colon despite being told it multiple times at school and once having my teacher read out the opening of an essay because of my great use of a semicolon. But what I’m trying to do with the semi colon in the above sector is connect “It hurts because I’m in love with you” so making two sentences that can go well next to the words before the first comma in the sentence and I really like that sentience and I’m really enjoying looking at it and I think I’m gonna practice calligraphy just so I could write that sentence in the beautiful it deserves and if that’s not what you’re meant to do with a semi colon then I don’t wanna be right)
This is a note to myself that the above is the title of a poem I need to write.
Maybe a pastiche of Alas I Cannot Swim?